December 31, 2013

Why are we making this so-called "New year resolustion"?

The end of the year is coming and soon I will be publishing my 2014 New Year resolution.
The big question is why do we do it at all? Why do we keep making this list? And how many of us really look at it after it is written? Why do we make ourselves promises we (most of the times) can't keep? For whatever reasons may it be?

I was first introduced to New Year's resolution concept several years ago when I began reading blogs. Sometime earlier I was participating in a series of life coaching sessions. At one point the coach asked the audience, "So where do you see yourself in 10 years? Whatever it is, write it down." It was my first time to be asked a question like that and I got a little bit scared. I scribbled something in my notebook but kept on thinking. Then we got asked the same question about the 5 years, a year and 6 months. This is when I was first introduced to the concept of planning my own life.

I remembered that at these life coaching sessions we were asked to be as precise as possible (Where do you want to live? What does your hose look like? How many rooms are in there? What is the color of its walls?). I was puzzled but started fantasizing.

After that I began reading more self-development blogs and by the end of the year they all raised the same subject: The New Year Resolution. Plan your own life. And Write it down. So I did. I made a list and specified to the date.

After finishing the year and seeing how little was accomplished, I felt a bit disappointed because the erased part was really not big at all.

I promised myself to be better next year and made a new list with more stuff in it.

2-3 years passed by and I realized that this "per size to the minute" method does not work for me. I understood that my promises were not enough.

So I did a more freestyle list with plans only without dates. It was a dateless goal list with things I wanted to achieve this year. And that stuff didn't work too - ideas and goals changed, life changed and at that point I even forgot about this list. In the end of the year, when I found and read this list I felt so much disappointed. Even desperate.

Several years passed by.

After that I was introduced to the "don't make a goal list" idea. Don't plan your life. Don't build a list. Build a concept of what you want to become and who you'd like to be.

So I created another list. Nothing specific, just ideas that will be reached and done sometimes later in my life.
It's not even yearly, just something for the future.

Here's a part of it:
  1. Get a degree for kindergarten teacher and open one.
  2. Management degree.
  3. Learn to play a Darbuka (or any other cool instrument)
  4. Learn to Juggle.
  5. Learn to do balloon animals.
  6. ...........
What about you? What kind of list do you have? Because I have a VERY long one and it will be published soon.